02
Feb
10 New Commandments Found!
Well, according to the Weekly World News anyway. Here they are:
- I am the one God of all faiths. Thou shalt stop bickering about it.
- Thou shalt not make thee a graven image upon toast or other comestibles and declare it to be holy.
- Thou shalt not make war to obtain thy neighbor’s resources.
- Thou shalt hold thy mother and father close to thy bosom, putting them no tin rest homes.
- Thou shalt not abondon thy children upon divorce.
- Thou shalt not allow thy God-given girth to exceed thy height.
- Thou shalt speak and frolic with thy offspring and not place them before colored boxes of gaming.
- Thou shalt not press makers of noise or gesture in anger whilst in transit.
- Thou shalt discard containers of plastic and metal appropriately.
- Thou shalt not worship the housewives who are desperate, nor their box, upon the Sabbath
Also…
A black hole from space has been found in Black Rock Desert, NV
The government is creating a Department of the Paranormal
and Haiti’s first president was a zombie